Very often, I
come across people who are unhappy..
Over trivial
matters.
Things they can
never change.
And yet they will
not do anything to make things better for them or the people around them.
These kinds
of people are in their own prison-
and it's one that they created for themselves.
They have a
disease- it is called- obsessive compulsive complaining!
Though it is
good to vent out your emotions, it is not healthy to find fault with everything
in your life.
Staying home
is a problem- they would rather go out.
When they do
get to go out and on a planned holiday- the place they have decided to visit
does not seem to live up to their expectations.
Visiting relatives-
not to their liking.
Someone visiting
them- frowned upon.!!
Having a cook
fixing your meals- wish you could do that instead!
When you do
get that opportunity when she takes a day off- why does she have to take a day
off and make me do this work!
Family staying
with them- I have no privacy.
No family – I
do not get any support from family!
Why does
acceptance become so difficult in today’s life? Why do we think complaining
wins us accolades?
An average
person complains about 15- 20 times a day!
That is a lot
without us knowing about it!
It must be
terribly lonely to not be able to accept life around them as it really is.
Will Bowen,
author of ‘A Complaint Free World’, lists five main reasons why people
complain.
- To
start a conversation- gain solidarity-misery seeks company- initially it is
nice to have someone share your frustration, till it gets irritating and they
walk away!
- To
avoid taking action by shirking responsibility-easier to feel that nothing will
change even if I do something about it and hence I don’t do anything about the
problem!!
- To
brag about superiority- I know better than you do, that is why I think you cannot do a better job than I can, and I will
ensure I am loud and clear about it
- To
control others- focus on the assumed and beat your audience into changing his
point of view and being the center of attention
- To
pre-excuse poor performance- knowing something will not work out well, we
preempt it and provide excuse for our actions.
I am guilty
of this as well..
Complaints
normally have a domino effect.
Everything around
you can crash down upon you.
Can we help
those who are chronic complainers-
YES-
work with them
patiently - do not be judgmental, ask them for a solution, help them to realize that happiness is just one acceptance away.
Today
accepting my situations has helped me move on and stay calm in the eye of a
storm.
Happiness comes
when we stop complaining about the troubles we have and say thanks to God for
the troubles we don’t have!
