Night or Day

Many years ago , the Oxfam Trailwalker caught my fancy. It was being talked about as a fund raiser walk.

Having grown up being exposed to NGO’s, fund raising, Red Cross, Oxfam, I was familiar with the work that was being done in the social sector. The fact that it also combined some physically challenging activity got me interested.

To be able to participate in any event, requires long term planning! So it was that the first year I decided, I could not do it.

The next year, got myself a team and enthusiastically raised funds. That by itself was a challenge, convincing friends and family about the cause. Convincing myself that it was important and working with colleagues, soon to become friends through this activity. It was all good fun!

The walk was well organised and the trail was challenging. We learnt a lot of lessons on holding things together, making decisions as one, understanding strengths and working on it! We were interested in doing it all over again!!!

The next year a new team, wonderful support crew and an amazing planning and training program! The fund raiser was even better with a record 2 day in reaching the minimum target all from within our company! This proved to us that what we were doing was not in vain, there were still people who believed in our cause.

The walk this time was even more fun, with a wonderful team, a great support crew and lot of conversations!!! Them I can still count on as friends for a lifetime!!! Night time walks, bearing the brunt of the sun, supporting each other, sticking together!!!

So it was that Mumbai beckoned me, this time teaming up with classmates from many years ago! Not the young bunch I was used to walking with! But definitely wiser, stronger in mind and body!

We did not train together, responsibilities keeping us apart! But constant messaging kept the momentum going!

We had the best support from our support crew which was initially a classmate and her husband, she roped in two of her friends who had experience of the trail! This helped us immensely in getting us ready with all we may need.

We managed two training walks together, 2 at a time! We were told to train on trails, on hills, we did what we thought was a hill and a trail!

We walked, cycled, played football, ran, got our body ready for the 100 kms!  I made our target plan for 33 hours, since the trail was considered tough and we prepared ourselves to meet the time! We had big plans for partying that night!!

We thought we were ready!

We travelled to meet our support team and start on our journey to the trail start point.

The place we stayed was in the middle of nowhere! It was beautiful, we were excited!

We started early the next day, reached the start point late, but did not bother us, we were out to have fun!

The trail was a challenge from the starting point! It started with an ascent and walking on narrow ledges!

The sun rose early even in the western ghats!! We were assaulted by the morning sun even at 10:00 AM . This was a new kind of heat for us from Bangalore facing the sun after weeks of clouds and rain!

There were old and young walkers, not all looked fit or prepared for this kind of climb! It was a struggle, even the 10 kms taking 4 hours!!!

We thought the topography would change, but no, we continued walking on rocks, climbing up and down, every step a challenge, slowly turning into frustration!

The sun was merciless, the trail was unforgiving! We tried to have conversations, but failed to carry it forward since we were marching on in single file!

Having walked the Bangalore trail walk route, we had expectations of company, villages, people, signs of life! Here we were left on our own to  blindly follow arrows and ribbons! The map lay unused, untouched! It was of no use! There was no network connectivity, no GPS connection.

The checkpoints were very functional, with minimal support!  Hot water which is a necessity for most walkers was not found at most places, getting a hot cup of tea was a luxury. Not many beds to stretch out for a much needed break!  Insufficient tents, chairs!!!

What was good was the availability of physiotherapists to give our aching muscles a good stretch! They were the miracle workers! Never have I used the support of physios in all my years of running, walking and participating in such events! I did here, twice!! That speaks a lot about how much of punishment my muscles were undergoing!

The food was good, available immediately! Our support crew did not have place to sit at most places, which was a sad situation because they needed rest too to with all the running around they were doing to help us!!

We were hoping to walk through the night to escape the harsh sun, but felt the sun was better than dark! It was safer, we could see where we stepped, if the path existed !!  Night or day?

We did try the night walking, left us tired, frustrated, sleepy,stressed and scared! We managed a short nap to help us get back on the trail!! Our minds were slowly zoning out. Legs were giving up!  I wanted to call friends to keep talking to me to help me get my mind back! There was no signal!! I was scared to talk to my co-walkers, my fear would get to them as well!! Atleast this way we could silently trudge on!! Could we complete?? Left it to fate!!!  

The next morning, after 50 kms, it was slightly better, with light!! A new day always brings hope! We walked on quietly, through similar terrains, eyes on the ground, feet firmly finding a place on the rocky stretches!! There was rarely sound of laughter, singing or talk on the trail, which I had loved during my past two walks!!!

The finish was getting close, but the distances seemed longer!! A 7 km walk took us 3 hours?????? And a lot more steps!!! And a lot of ups and downs!!!

The last stretch could have been made easy, we had already been subjected to a tough trail, we had proved it in 94 kms that we were made of a tougher skin, but no, the last 6 kms took us back into the treacherous trails, walking through the night, in constant rain, with no place to shelter, crossing slippery river beds! 

Did we receive a noisy welcome? No, the finish point was washed out in the rains, no place to sit for the tired walkers, the physios had packed up and left since they had not planned for such a situation!

There was no food to welcome us, the tea had become cold having been kept in the rain! The chairs and tent was wet and cold!

We did not care that our timing was registered wrong, we waited for certificates, all the while standing because no one cared that we should get some rest!!

What was obvious during the whole experience was to me it seemed that no one cared!! (This does not include our support crew or friends and family who were following our journey throughout and rooting for us) The trail was not considered safe, if there was any accident, getting to safety was not easy, getting medical aid was not possible, walking with an injured person would have been a mammoth task. Only on two segments did I see volunteers in tents.

During the whole walk, though we saw signage across the trail, talking about our ''walk for equality'', the cause could not be felt!! It felt more of a challenge than walk for a cause! Walking 100 kms by itself is no easy feat and to be able to achieve that for a cause is commendable!

Were they promoting the challenging trail walk – no the name is misleading in itself!! It cannot be classified as a walk,it was a hike, a trek of 100 kms!!!  

Was every person interested in raising funds fit enough to take on this trail? No!! So if I have the inclination to raise funds for a cause, Oxfam Mumbai is not meant for me, so it is the challenge which is given the priority?

I feel empty, I feel like something has been taken away from me, but I got nothing in return, and all I was expecting was a satisfaction of having walked 100 kms for a cause I believed in!  I felt cheated of the fun I should have been having and not left feeling scared of the trail!! In between it all, I started losing faith in humanity and trusting only the supreme power!

Cause or challenge?

Slow And Steady

“The thoughts that occur to me while I’m running are like clouds in the sky. Clouds of all different sizes. They come and they go, while the sky remains the same sky always. The clouds are mere guests in the sky that pass away and vanish, leaving behind the sky.”
― Haruki Murakami, What I Talk About When I Talk About Running

Any reader of Murakami would be able to tell you that his style of writing is disjoint, his thoughts disconnected, surreal, yet believable!
I had a tough time reading Kafka on the Shore, maybe cats can talk?

So it was that I decided to finally read “What I talk about when I talk about running” Two marathons in and several years of running later, I had the courage to pick it up!
There are books about running a plenty in the market with this being the most popular among fitness enthusiasts. I event noticed an apartment complex in the outskirts of Bangalore advertising a 1 km running track as its USP!!!

This book of Murakami is not about running! It is about finding himself through running! From managing a jazz club in his 20’s to running and writing!  
He does not give tips about running, techniques or the kind of diet to follow or the schedules which would work best!

He writes instead about his runs every day, how he built his endurance over the years and the sheer determination which became him.  He writes about how his focus as a writer, a speaker improved once he became disciplined in his schedules. About living with goals and living life to the fullest.  His strict regime which has made him such a fine runner!

“Being active every day makes it easier to hear that inner voice.”
― Haruki Murakami, What I Talk About When I Talk About Running

About the people he bumps into, the small victories.

Again, true to his style, he jumps around! Moving across continents! Running spots! 

How would it resonate with a non-runner- would it motivate them to hit the road, or even a tread mill? No!
How would the book help a runner- other than telling them to “just run’’, not much help!
Did it make a difference to me- maybe…… he does not talk about cross training, core work outs, strength training, tempo runs and intervals. He just says “Run”

Yes, he did talk about his iron-man attempts and his success, his solo runs in Greece – All inspiring!

This is why I really liked the book! It resonates so well with me as a person!

“I’m the kind of person who likes to be by himself. To put a finer point on it, I’m the type of person who doesn’t find it painful to be alone. I find spending an hour or two every day running alone, not speaking to anyone, as well as four or five hours alone at my desk, to be neither difficult nor boring. I’ve had this tendency ever since I was young, when, given a choice, I much preferred reading books on my own or concentrating on listening to music over being with someone else. I could always think of things to do by myself.”
― Haruki Murakami, What I Talk About When I Talk About Running

 Many years ago I ran to forget, to lose myself. And instead found myself!

I look forward to discovering more of myself through his writing.

OOPS!!! I DID IT AGAIN!!!

Age=distance=just a number= 42.195
So, it was that my second full marathon happened.

With a new job, stress of traveling across the city on non-existent roads, sitting with legs cramped up for nearly 3 hours in a day and all resulting in a bad back, running took a back seat!
Though I had signed up for the city run, the training did not happen as I had hoped to do.
Stopping yoga was a heart breaker, it left me with nothing.

And I had signed up for the Mumbai trail walker a month away from the marathon! Wondered if I could do that with this kind of excruciating pain

So I stopped all running and focused on just walking! And a bit of cycling.

One month of complete stoppage of all that I was used to did make me sluggish and lose interest in a lot of things in life!

I did not indulge in eating out or drinking during this time, (the Coimbatore and Goa reunion do not count) the faint hope that I would recover enough to be able to run the marathon kept me in check.

I asked a friend for help, I knew it was too late to start off, but no harm trying. His training plan was not meant for a novice runner like me who had not yet conditioned her body to start off with a 25 km run! and he never checked my progress beyond the first week! It caused more heartache!

So I decided to test my back and legs in September. A 42^nd birthday gift to myself was to try and run and cycle a 42 kms during the day in total.

Managed a comfortable 17 km run and 25 km cycling on the day. Did not feel any pain, could function normally the next day. Gained a bit of confidence to try and increase the distance the next weekend and did manage a 25 km run!!  Happiness!

But the happy streak stopped with the pain slowly coming back as the commute worsened! Decided to change the work route and take a longer route to avoid potholed roads.

I was now determined to run! With just a month to go and a run not progressing beyond 3 kms ( this was supposed to be my 30 km weekend) I was not sure if I could or should or not!!!

I kept walking regularly, could not let down my trailwaker team!!!
Gave my long run one last shot and managed a 21 km!

So it was that, I decided to run the full marathon this year with just a few long runs of which 25km was the longest!

I received comments like ”you cannot run a marathon by just walking”
My confidence did not wane!

Signed up with a pacer who was firm on a ‘’all run no walk’’ strategy.

Again the doubts crept in, I had never done this before!!

You won’t know till you try and put in your best efforts!!

 

So I did, put in my faith, trust and ran!!
Never walked!!

FABULOUS FORTIES

Yet another birthday went by!

This one was a big one, but made no noise!

 

It came silently and crept out in the quiet of the night as quietly as it came in~!

I spent it with lots of time spent in thinking while running and cycling -42 kms in total to mark the magical age!

It made me realise what was important in life for me in my forties.....

Here are 40 thoughts on the wonderful forties!

 

1.    Parents- give time to your parents, just as you are getting old, so are they! Listen to them, even if they ramble!

2.    Friends- They are the ones who will be there when the children have all gone away. They will be the best support system.

3.    Love- fall in love with your spouse, pet, life! Gives a reason to smile!

4.    Books – reading makes you so knowledgeable and worldly wise- It exposes you to otherwise unknown cultures and lives

5.    Running- never too late to run, I completed my first full marathon in my forties! Even a 30 minute run every 3 days is enough to keep you energetic!

6.    Cycling- Not as bad on the knees – it keeps you sexy enough to fit into your favourite jeans!

7.    Walking- a good walk every alternate day gives you a clear head and loads of oxygen!  Walk while you still can:)

8.    Giving – celebrate the joy of giving- donate stuff- clear your closets and home and give away to the needy, it makes you feel so good to see someone else so happy!

9.    Goals – set Goals for yourself- either work related, career, personal- it helps to have something to work towards.

10. Children- They will soon be gone to college, in the next 10 years,  spend time playing board games with them, singing with them or going on trips, anything which can get you talking and spending hours together

11. Saving- if not now then it’s too late- You still have another 20 years of working life to plan for your retirement, do it now!

12. Risks – take a risk in life while you can still bounce back, maybe in your career trying a new place, new role, or in love?

13. Dream- have a dream which excites you to wake up everyday and brings a smile to your face! Dont fear to dream

14. Laugh – from your belly, the rolling over in pain with no inhibition kind! It feels soo good! Watch a funny movie and laugh your head off!

15. Newness

16. RAK – I discovered Random act of kindness this year and made that my birthday goal. Do without expecting, out of the blue acts are the most satisfying!

17. Learn – take up a course, something to add value to your career, never too late to learn

18. Food – eat right, avoid junk!!!

19. Drinks- in moderation,  avoid looking at getting drunk, you are over that age! A glass of wine once in a while is good for your soul and body, No More!

20. Calcium- invest in your future, take care of your bones, Now!

21. Cook- show your children you can, so that they may learn basic necessities, plus it’s a fun activity to do with your kids!

22. Self-love- if you love a spa treatment, do it, if you love a massage take it! It’s all in the Now, when you can pay for it and consider it an investment for your future!

23. Sleep- get your beauty sleep every night, everything else can wait!

24. Dress up- you are still not too old to look good! Buy that dress you always wanted, spend some money on your own self! Pinks, Purples, Oranges!

25. Journal- or blog- such wonderful memories to look back on when you are old!

26. Yoga- no more said!!

27. Hair-love it, nourish it, take good care of it!

28. Pictures- take pictures of yourself with family, friends, create memories

29. SOLO- do a solo trip once! You are old enough to travel by yourself and still young enough to take care of yourself!

30. Say it- lose the ego, if angry say it, if upset say it, don’t hold back and kill yourself over it!

31. Smile- ever so often, life is still not bad, you are not yet old! You still have teeth!!!

32. Work- very hard to reach the level you had always wanted to in your career, work smart to get there faster! Love your job!

33. Water- No soda, save that kidney! Save your skin!

34. Forgive- those who hurt you, those whom you think may have hurt you, those who are still hurting you, you will feel good! That’s what matters

35. Expectations- zero!! Don’t expect anything from anyone- try living like the saints! Difficult to start off, but easy to practice once you learn how to! 

36. Satin- just get that satin sheet and pillowcase- Bliss- Don’t wait till it’s too late!

37. Sex- have it! Whenever! Still feels good!

38. Meditate- for 15 minutes a day, in absolute silence, preferably first thing in the morning! 

39. Cry- its ok to let it out, its ok to feel sad and regret losses! Which happen more with aunts and uncles and parents aging! A sense of loss will prevail! Be grateful for times spent and memories gathered!

40. Pray- everyday! Every night! A silent thank you is also enough!

Mute On

WhatsApp era.

Days of accessible 4G, smartphones plenty.

Accessibility, re-establishing relationships! Long lost friends found!

Invasions of privacy.  Status messages which spoke more than a hello, goodbye.

Single lines, blue lines and double lines!!

Feelings of being ignored, suspicions.

Frustrations!

Infidelity and the late night sweet nothings.

If you had nothing to say, there were images and videos just for the occasion.

Together, we brought in a change in communication. 

We had a lot to say!!

And then there were group chats, bringing more fun, more connections and ease of communication across the globe

It was a game of fastest fingers first!

The ever familiar ping heard across office floors, in buses and trains.

Constant flashing of the messages, buzzing of the phone.

Noisy, some melodious.

Night and day!

The flash of light at night, the urge to read, the last seen time stamp.

Some semblance of privacy when the last seen time stamp could now be deactivated.

The read notification turned off.

More in control.

The biggest blessing being the mute on!!

All group conversations could be muted.

We could sleep again!

Save for the Strangers who thought they were friends and their constant messaging!!

WhatsApp now has gone the Facebook way!

All conversations can be muted, friends can be silenced!

My life on mute!

An Epicurean Ball

Eat, drink and be merry took on a whole new meaning when the Goan weekend took off.
We had it all planned, the pickup points decided to the minute.
We were well on time.
The road was perfect, times when you really enjoy a long drive.
The conversations flowed, the familiarity of old friends, comfort.

There are not many eateries on the road from Bangalore to Belgaum and we had to open up our stash of cakes and biscuits while we looked for a breakfast joint.
Hot breakfast on the way and we continued on roads meant just for that! Smooth drives!!

We passed through a stretch of Ghats with constant rain for company, skilful driving and scenic valleys had us crossing it in no time!

Reaching Goa felt like a homecoming!
Across from our old campus, we stopped to relax by our favourite haunt, Genes across from our campus!

The river Mandovi flowed ever so calmly, bringing back memories of the years spent by its side. The food, the music, the company, the laughter.

A late lunch and the Goan beer to get started on our weekend!

The chalet was a beauty. Situated along the river banks, nestled this piece of Goan wonder!

Its architecture and the interiors were interesting and gave a homely feel.

Found on Airbnb, it was a use and pay place with a well-stocked pantry, 2 kitchens, 4 bedrooms, walkouts to the river front and balconies overlooking the Mandovi. Its location was central to Panjim and Old Goa, in Ribandar, which had been our home for 2 years.
We soaked in the calmness of the place, beer in hand, watching the ferries go to Diwar and back, viewing the Salim Ali bird sanctuary in the distance. A perfect setting.

And then the evening began with the locals and foreigners reaching! They brought with them food enough to feed a home full of hungry men ( or so we thought then) and enough liquor for all the Epicureans in the world ( or so we thought again)

While we were in college, we lived on the good will of kind parents and the pocket money which never lasted! Liquor was Goan beer, fenny or the Old Monk Rum! 
17 years later we had plenty and our tastes had refined with living and dining in countries around the world!!
And food, plenty of it, a variety, a feast.

A night of singing, music ( a guitar, mouth organ ) and laughter! A night which never ended.

Morning, saw me quickly run up to Old Goa to visit the church, being Independence day also saw the flag hoisted at the Cajetan cathedral.

A long favourite Casa De Cha and a familiar breakfast – the Goan pao.  Visit to our campus in Ribandar, reliving memories, most good, some still hurt even with the passing years.

A drive to Diwar island, on the ferry, now famous because of the movie "Finding Fanny''
being shot there, for us, it only held memories of walks along the fields, bus journeys to the church. Calmness.

Back again for more drinks, food and a late night visit to Joet’s at Bogmalo.
Memories of another day, in January when I had visited that place with a young friend! A happening joint along the beach, with wonderful music!
The evening was made more wonderful with our own guys taking the mike and singing familiar tunes!  While some of us old birds called it a night and headed back to the chalet in the wee hours of the morning, the more adventurous lot decided to try their luck at the many casinos of Goa.

Sleep comes easy when the mind, body and heart are content!

Morning, decided to take the bus to Panjim for a run along to Miramar. A Sunday morning visit to the church and a short run along the Mandovi again to the sea.
The roads were washed clean from the rains, the constant slow drizzle, not enough to drench, just enough to feel a spray.

A slip, a fall, a cracked phone and wounded ego!

Back to the chalet in time to meet a bunch of breakfast hunters and it was back to the city again for a hot breakfast. A crowded favourite again, visit Café Bhonsles for some real good hot puri and bhaji the Goan way.

A bit of shopping and bumping into an old Professor on the streets of Panjim in the most unexpected places. A quick hello and introductions all around, not knowing where the night would lead us!

Back to the chalet for a wash and a trip to our campus now settled in Sanquelim.

Meeting old professors, making plans for the night and back to the chalet!

This was our temporary home and we made it homely! More shopping, more food and we had a well stocked pantry.

This night, we had our professors for company and that is an experience which none of us will easily forget. GIM gave us this feeling of comfort with professors who taught us subjects we had no clue about, who were easy to hate for making it all so difficult but whom we loved for being understanding about it!  Professors, guides, mentors, friends.

The night continued with its own bit of confusion, sleeplessness and an early morning trip to the airport.

And warm fuzzy memories, alcohol induced in-between wakefulness and sleeplessness and back to Bangalore for a life of routine.

Not once did I feel weird being the one girl among the 14 men.

The 3 days will remain wonderful memories for us who were there, the pictures constant reminders of the fun and laughter and letting go.

The Guilt Trip

Yet another reunion plan, but this time a feeling different from excitement.

Every working mother goes through a guilt trip when she decides to take a trip leaving the kids behind.  For me it was double the guilt being a single mother, working painfully long hours with the daily commute adding to the frustration of not being able to spend time at home with kids and dependent on old parents to run the show at home.

So weekends are normally spent quietly at home being a good daughter, mother and setting the home in order for the week ahead.

The past few weeks have been chaos with a major college reunion taking up my waking and sleeping hours.

The college reunion had been planned a year in advance.  It went off well and was good fun!

Running is good fun too and knowing there was a HM organised in Tuticorin, decided to sign up, book tickets and do that too, as unprepared as I was.

Due to bad weather, the run got cancelled, but I decided to still keep the ticket and do my quick weekend trip to Tuticorin to meet and spend time with family.

So it was, that someone, me, who never travelled anywhere, happened to do 2 weekends away from home in 3 weeks!

The travel though justified, still left me with a twinge of guilt for leaving my responsibilities behind!

 
When a Goan reunion was planned (the annual GIM alumni meet) I hesitated. My heart craved for it, the brain said NO.
 
The guys had it all worked out, they were planning to drive down and return the same way. The rooms were booked, so there was nothing left for me to do, other than pack my bags and leave!
Yet the brain persevered.
The deciding factor was an All Hands meeting on the Friday the guys were supposed to leave.
There was no way I could take off on that day.

Having joined this company just 2 months back, I had no leave left to squander, they were precious, I had to save on them to plan for emergency leave for kids as well as vacations with them.

I rued the day I lost my 20 days leave at my old company, I could have done with few of those right now.

So it was decided that I would not travel. Peace though tough to come by, reigned within me. I told the guys No, I would not come! My feelings of guilt temporarily left me, I had laundry to do, grocery to buy and kids to take care of!

 
A sudden change in date for the All Hands Meeting, had me thinking again, Should I or not?
Thursday morning message from a friend, “Be ready by 5:00 AM, will pick you up””

Just the wanting, leaves you guilt ridden!!!! I steeled myself and asked my kids if I could go!

They were not very happy, but said “Yes, you can go, but remember I am not happy about this”
I sent my little one to talk to my parents, being scared to ask them myself (42 and fearful!!!)
The question came back through the little one, "'how was I planning to go'', they were okay with the thought (!!!!) being a reunion, but the How was the worrisome bit!
When I said, drive, the answer was an emphatic NO!! They would drink and drive, it was not safe!! Etc etc etc!!
I knew what they said was true! Been around guys long enough to know this bit is true!!

So I went to work, my mind already wandering to Goa, people at work heard my heart thudding Goa.

For many planning a trip to Goa is for the beaches, the food, the touristy part, the feel of the place. All I was looking forward to was a getaway, a letting go of self, a time to find myself.

 I did not know who was going, coming or would be part of the reunion. All I knew was I would meet some friends from the past, meet some old Professors and feel at home!  

The college reunion and travel to Tuticorin were not that.  The Goan memories and connects were stronger!

Even with a No from home, I decided to have a return ticket booked, not wanting to spend a day in travel. I could always cancel if my mind prevailed!

 
The guilt was strong, the feeling of deserting my family for a selfish reason was preying hard on me, yet…..I prayed and called up home around 5:00 pm to try my luck once more!!
And I was lucky, I got a yes!!!
 
Immediately seeking approval from my boss at work, the guilt again creeping in, I went home!
I apologised to the kids for leaving them behind second weekend in a row, asking my mom if she could manage, telling them not to be a trouble ( they never are!!!) made sure, packed my bags and looked forward to a still guilt filled trip!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sunrise to Sunset

The weekend that went by saw yet another train journey.

This has been quite a record for me who never gets an opportunity to travel by overnight trains to do 2 such journeys in a month.

Travel by train requires advance thinking and planning in India. With the ticketing window open 3 months in advance, tickets get booked much earlier.

And so it was that this trip was planned in May. A 2 day trip, touch and go, to my roots!

A run organised in Tuticorin, the town of my birth, prompted me to book my tickets and think about running there, not much into traveling to run, this was an exception, a yearning!

Did not give it much thought after the booking, since the college reunion took precedence and created more excitement.

Tuticorin to me, while growing up meant great grandparents showering their love, aunts and uncles and cousins and play all day. Out on the streets, in the sun, visiting relatives, beach trips, churches and heavenly food! Sand everywhere, in your hair, in your shoes, in your bed!!!

A town where time to me stood still, where clothes spoke of wealth and jewels adorned every man and woman.

After moving out of TamilNadu and getting a taste of the North, West, East and other parts of South India, Tuticorin was left orphaned!

Trips were rare with work, children, school and other interests taking over my life.

Cousins had left town, few remained, but the childhood feelings had long gone and what was left was a distant memory. The house we spent our holidays in had been sold and the street held no recollection for me!

Yet, I looked forward to the run for more than just the run, a chance to be back where I was always loved and greeted with genuine affection. Where I was proud of my family genealogy!

When the run was postponed, I felt no sorrow. With an ailing uncle and aunt, with cousins and babies who were still not met, I decided to still visit.

Yes, the town had aged along with me, the buildings looked grey in the afternoon sun, some had been renovated still wore a weary look of having seen time pass by.

I loved the feel of sand under my feet, in my hair and in my bed.

It was all I was hoping for, loads of love, amazingly fresh food, smell of the sea, special churches, rekindling memories, creating new ones, babies and kisses and hugs!!! No one was a stranger. It felt like coming home!

Pampered, loved, one sunrise to another sunset.