Sunday, 9 November 2014

Being Single



I have been single for more years than I was married.
But I have 2 big school going kids to show for that short marriage!

Many conversations with strangers and acquaintances leave them embarrassed and me wondering what is wrong with people!!

Many start thus with random strangers ( aka called kids’ friends’ parents)

She: You are Ak1’s mom?
Me: Yes and you are XYZ’s mom? I’m Shiromi.
She: Yes, can I have your number!!!!
Numbers exchanged ( Being popular girls’ mom gets my number asked more often than I get my number asked for being me!!!)
She: how does your daughter always manage to do well in everything, we always talk about her!
Me:  I am a strict mom (smiling, unsure how they would take the truth)
She: Do you work?
Me: Yes, am in HR
She: What about your husband?
Me: I don’t have one, am divorced!!

Silence! Conversation stopper!!!

She: I am sorry!
Me: Don’t be!!

The end!


He:  You are Ak2’s mom?
Me:Yes, You must be Abc’s dad! He takes after you!
He: Yes! I see you here at school for all functions, do you work?
Me: Yes, I work in a software firm.
He:  What about your husband?
Me: I’m divorced!
He: Mumbles something and looks at his phone looking for an escape!

Then there are the other kinds of people!! The ones who decide that their life sucks and yours rock!!
The ones who know you are single and have your parents with you.

She: how do you manage to stay so thin?
Me: It takes effort! I run
She: Oh, how do you find time?
Me: I make time, I wake up at 4:30 am to fit in running!
She: Oh, you are so lucky, I have to wake up to cook and get the children ready, how do you manage?
Me: My mother does the cooking, I have a cook to help with dinner as well.
She: Oh you are soo lucky, you have your mother to help! I have to do everything by myself!
Me: I pay a premium for the cook and cleaning girl to ensure my mom doesn’t have to struggle and pay a premium for the apartment which is 5 mins walk away from school!
She: Oh you are so lucky, your mother is there to supervise them!
Me: speechless!! 



I constantly hear people complain about having to live with parents/in-laws and not having their privacy, not able to go out for dinner, not  able to live their lives.
Did they ever wonder, if those same parents/in laws had wanted their privacy and asked them to leave home while growing up, what would they have done as kids?

I hear about spouses being nagging, not being considerate and how unhappy they are and how lucky I am that I get to live my life the way I want and wear what I want and go where I want.
Would they consider a divorce to earn that so called happiness they miss?

I hear “friends” say how lucky I am to have my parents with me and “not have to worry about anything”
Do they realize that they could too if they chose, but they choose not to!!!

I hear a lot about how marriage is such a pain and how they miss their freedom!!
I also get to hear about how I can “sleep around” while they are stuck to being monogamous!!!!!
I sometimes wonder if they say it to make me feel bad!!!

To all those who are the constant complainers and who think my life is “awesome” this is what I say:

“Always look at how far you have come rather than how far you have to go. Always count your blessing, not what you are missing” Ramakrishna Paramahansa. 


And of course



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